During the holiday break last year between Christmas and New Year, there was a low point where I felt completely stranded and helpless. In that moment I had an idea of what Anna might suggest… think about next year and what you would like to get from our work. I broke my old and rather painful tradition of setting New Years resolutions that really only set me up for failure and instead wrote a more gentle set of intentions.
Today, almost a whole year after writing it, I shared it with Anna. She smiled warmly at me after reading it and said, ‘well done, I see you doing all of these things… all of those seeds you’ve planted and all of the buds appearing… and we don’t do these things all the time but I see you being brave every time you come back to a session, working on bringing that awareness back to yourself. I see this in you! Well done, this is lovely. Would you add anything for next year?’ I looked at it, thought about it then said, ‘maybe I don’t always have to be brave…’ Anna said, ‘there’s bravery in being afraid remember! Being afraid and showing up anyway.’ I said, ‘I need to work on crying when I need to cry…’ and that’s what the rest of our session was focused on. What is stopping me from ‘really crying’ with her.
Intentions: be kind to myself, forgive myself, trust my intuition, care for my body, move when I need to, eat when I need to, sleep when I need to, cry when I need to, let others help me, be patient with myself, listen more, be open to change, be brave, practice mindfulness, let go.’